My mom died last night?

omg i cant believe this is even happening. i mean what else do i deserve. im only 16!? i was already having other problems. my mom used to take care of my grandma because she is already dying of dementia, and she always got so stressed out, and would come home and then say stuff like i cant handle this i wish i never had any kids or i wish i could go back in time and change everything i did. her doctor put her on a lot of medication for anxiety, depression, and other stuff. i dont ever see my dad, he works hours away from where we live. well last night my mom overdosed on xanax? i dont know some medication her doctor prescribed her. its probably my fault too because she always said she cant handle having kids and taking care of her mom. i cant even explain my emotions right now like really. im SOO upset and angry and mad, and ive been crying all day but i dont know if its cause im mad or im sad, bc we didnt get along hardly at all. im so lost, i mean now i dont even have a mom :(